Yalden Speaks To Area Schools & Parents
- Guest Writer--Toby Gullion
- Sep 24, 2015
- 5 min read
Motivational Speaker and Teen Suicide Prevention advocate Jeff Yalden spent a full day at Salem and South Central High Schools addressing the recent teen suicides in the area and the day ended with a presentation for the community.
WJBD's Toby Gullion was there and filed this report
Marion County has seen more than its fair share of teen suicides over the past 12 calendar months with 6 reported cases in that time plus more losses of young people due to accidents.
In response, South Central and Salem High Schools welcomed motivational speaker and teen suicide prevention advocate Jeff Yalden to the schools on Tuesday. Yalden spent the day at both high schools speaking to over 1200 total students, faculty and staff about his techniques in identifying, questioning, persuading and referring those in need to the right people to help prevent another tragedy.
South Central Principal Steve Phillips said the day was a very good one for his school. "Our kids had a lot of questions afterwards, but good questions. And our counselor was busy all afternoon, but in a good way."
After a full day of talking with students, Yalden opened his presentation to the public at an event held at Salem High last night in front of about 60 in attendance. The former Marine who admittedly suffers from being Bi Polar as well as PTSD knows how tragic suicide can be having witnessed a fellow marine kill himself in 1992.
Yalden disposed of some common myths about suicide including that suicidal people keep their plans to themselves or that those who talk about suicide don't do it. In fact, most suicidal people communicate their intent sometime during the week preceding their attempt and people who talk about suicide may try, or even complete, an act of self-destruction.
Yalden also said it was a myth that no one can stop a suicide and that it is inevitable. In fact, if people in crises get the help they need, they will probably never be suicidal again. And perhaps the biggest and most dangerous myth being only experts can prevent suicide.
Yalden pleaded with the crowd that suicide prevention is everybody's business and anyone can help prevent the tragedy of suicide.
Yalden added, "schools today are under so much pressure from the state to get scores up. That pressure is then transferred to the teachers and all the way down to the students. I think problems with kids today is that they are lacking coping skills, communication skills, and now you are asking them to do common core math?"
Yalden gave several examples of situations he has been involved in over the past 10 years of speaking on mental health issues and teen suicide as well as the past 23 years as a motivational speaker. He spoke of those who followed through on their attempt, those who failed and lived to tell the story and others who considered it but never took the final step. He added that just because adults don't think problems are big enough to cause someone to think about ending their life, the fact is that those problems are big enough for those students to consider the impulse decision to end their life instead of facing consequences or something uncomfortable.
Yalden also gave an incredible stat saying that on average, a family will spend less than 30 seconds a day in meaningful conversation in a 24 hour period.
Following the program, Salem principal John Boles closed by saying there were a lot of fingers being pointed from all sorts of people when it comes to where the blame lies. Boles encouraged those in attendance to try to do what is in the best interest of the kids and that they are all in this together, from students, parents to staff all the way to the mental health professionals.
For more information on Jeff Yalden and his work you can visit his two websites at: notthesolution.com and theforeverdecision.com.
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Less than 24 hours of Jeff's presentation, Salem lost another young girl to suicide. Below is his response and encouragment for the Salem, IL community.
Motivational speaker Jeff Yalden hadn't even made the trip back to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina when he was inundated with messages. Not 24 hours after speaking to Salem and South Central high school students, the long time suicide prevention advocate received word of another tragic loss. The 7th teen suicide in the last year. Yalden wasted no time when he returned home crafting a You Tube video message to the community.
In the video, Yalden sent a direct message to the youth of Marion County….
"To all of the teenagers, we are all in this together. My friends I know life is hard. I know you have struggles every single day, but something that I want you to understand is that today's pain doesn't equal tomorrow's life."
Yalden also said he understands that the trials and tribulations of kids can seem overwhelming at times…
"You might be struggling today I understand. There are many of your friends struggling each and everyday. School is hard, making friends is hard, trying to be accepted is hard, trying to just fit in is hard but you have to believe that no matter what you are going through it will be ok. You have to believe that there is always hope. You don't ever want to lose hope. And if you do lose hope, you have to do everything you can to get that hope back."
The ex-marine who suffers from Bi Polar Disorder and PTSD and openly talks about his conditions, says even
when times are bad, you have to find that hope.
"To give up, to quit, to walk away…for what? I don't know maybe you don't want to be a burden on your family's life? You're not. We as parents go through tough times too."
And he added that in our striving for "perfection" we forget something very important.
"Life is not easy. Life is not fair. Life will never be fair. Perfection in life does not exist. It only exists in the people that want to see you fail, that don't like you, that ridicule you and see you not succeed. People are jealous of people and that's where perfection comes from. Perfection doesn't exist. What does exist is that you strive everyday to be a good person, do the best you can, be kind and when you get knocked down you get back up, and when you get knocked down a second time you get back up a third time."
If you know of anyone struggling with thoughts of harming themselves, please reach out to a trusted adult and let them know there could be an issue. It just might save a life.
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